The Ecphorizer
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English: An expressive language Contributed by Per Toft § I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me. § Police were called to a daycare where a three-year-old was resisting a rest. § Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off? He's all right now § The roundest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference. § The butcher backed up into the meat grinder and got a little behind in his work § To write with a broken pencil is pointless. § When fish are in schools they sometimes take debate. § The short fortuneteller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large. § A thief who stole a calendar got twelve months. § A thief fell and broke his leg in wet cement. He became a hardened criminal. § Thieves who steal corn from a garden could be charged with stalking. § We'll never run out of math teachers because they always multiply. § When the smog lifts in Los Angeles, U C L A. § The professor discovered that her theory of earthquakes was on shaky ground. § The dead batteries were given out free of charge. § If you take a laptop computer for a run you could jog your memory. § A dentist and a manicurist fought tooth and nail. § What's the definition of a will? (It's a dead giveaway) § A bicycle can't stand alone; it is two tired. § Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like a banana. § A backward poet writes inverse. § In a democracy it's your vote that counts; in feudalism, it's your Count that votes § A chicken crossing the road: poultry in motion. § If you don't pay your exorcist you can get repossessed. § With her marriage she got a new name and a dress. § Show me a piano falling down a mine shaft and I'll show you A-flat miner. § When a clock is hungry it goes back four seconds. § The guy who fell onto an upholstery machine was fully recovered. § A grenade fell onto a kitchen floor in France, resulted in Linoleum Blownapart. § You are stuck with your debt if you can't budge it. § He broke into song because he couldn't find the key. § A calendar's days are numbered. § A lot of money is tainted: 'Taint yours, and 'taint mine. § A boiled egg is hard to beat. § He had a photographic memory which was never developed. § A plateau is a high form of flattery § Those who get too big for their britches will be exposed in the end. § When you've seen one shopping center you've seen a mall. § When she saw her first strands of gray hair, she thought she'd dye. § Bakers trade bread recipes on a knead to know basis. § Santa's helpers are subordinate clauses. § Acupuncture: a jab well done. More Articles by contributed by Per toft |
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