The Ecphorizer

Gale Warning
Warren Fogard

Issue #19 (March 1983)

Modern Millie, Rock of Ages,
Everybody's clinging vine.   
Pay her less than peon's wages,
She will be your Valentine.
She'll keep your house,
She'll tend your babies,
Gladly, even, will she bear'm.
Your cat's got fleas?
Your dog's got rabies?
Sackcloth 'n' ashes she will wear 'm.
She'll take the blame,
She'll pay the piper,
When your bills crawl overdue,
She'll bake a pie,
She'll change a diaper,
Like the good Lord meant her to.
With these tasks or any other
She'll be reverent and brave,
But silent? NO! God help you brother,
She'll talk you right into your grave. 


Frequent contributor Warren Fogard once suggested that we name this magazine "The Clang-Bird."  Well, that's the way Warren is.

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Big Mike
Bill Rowen

Issue #19 (March 1983)

Sally was late
For her Big Mike date
They found her in a crate
In a decomposed state

Big Mike said he taught
Law, Jill's mother thought
Her mother got a shocker
 When they found her in a locker

Big Mike met Jean
When she was just a teen
They found her in some sacks
By the railroad tracks

Big Mike thought Sue was cute
But she didn't give a hoot
They found her down a chute
 With holes like a flute

Clair's perfume was strong musk
As she met Mike at dusk
They found her in a trunk
And they all said it stunk 


Mathematician Bill Rowan divides his time between poetry and computer programming.  He writes that he "loves to get hugged."

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