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#	Time	Memory	Function	Location
1	0.0013	308616	{main}( )	.../site_page.php:0
2	0.0015	327680	include( '/home/crucl/public_html/EPS/includes/aliyu-settings.php' )	.../site_page.php:8
3	0.0018	346872	getdate ( )	.../aliyu-settings.php:39

( ! ) Warning: getdate(): It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected the timezone 'UTC' for now, but please set date.timezone to select your timezone. in /home/crucl/public_html/EPS/includes/aliyu-settings.php on line 39

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Time

Memory

Function

Location

0.0013

308616

{main}( )

.../site_page.php:0

0.0015

327680

include( '/home/crucl/public_html/EPS/includes/aliyu-settings.php' )

.../site_page.php:8

0.0018

346872

getdate ( )

.../aliyu-settings.php:39

( ! ) Warning: date(): It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are required to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected the timezone 'UTC' for now, but please set date.timezone to select your timezone. in /home/crucl/public_html/EPS/mod_top5.php on line 23
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#	Time	Memory	Function	Location
1	0.0013	308616	{main}( )	.../site_page.php:0
2	0.0066	434600	mod_top5tables( )	.../site_page.php:18
3	0.0066	434696	date ( )	.../mod_top5.php:23

( ! ) Warning: date(): It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected the timezone 'UTC' for now, but please set date.timezone to select your timezone. in /home/crucl/public_html/EPS/mod_top5.php on line 23

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Time

Memory

Function

Location

0.0013

308616

{main}( )

.../site_page.php:0

0.0066

434600

mod_top5tables( )

.../site_page.php:18

0.0066

434696

date ( )

.../mod_top5.php:23

( ! ) Warning: date(): It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are required to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected the timezone 'UTC' for now, but please set date.timezone to select your timezone. in /home/crucl/public_html/EPS/mod_top5.php on line 24
Call Stack
#	Time	Memory	Function	Location
1	0.0013	308616	{main}( )	.../site_page.php:0
2	0.0066	434600	mod_top5tables( )	.../site_page.php:18
3	0.0067	434840	date ( )	.../mod_top5.php:24

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Time

Memory

Function

Location

0.0013

308616

{main}( )

.../site_page.php:0

0.0066

434600

mod_top5tables( )

.../site_page.php:18

0.0067

434840

date ( )

.../mod_top5.php:24

( ! ) Warning: date(): It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are required to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected the timezone 'UTC' for now, but please set date.timezone to select your timezone. in /home/crucl/public_html/EPS/mod_top5.php on line 30
Call Stack
#	Time	Memory	Function	Location
1	0.0013	308616	{main}( )	.../site_page.php:0
2	0.0066	434600	mod_top5tables( )	.../site_page.php:18
3	0.0067	435032	date ( )	.../mod_top5.php:30

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Time

Memory

Function

Location

0.0013

308616

{main}( )

.../site_page.php:0

0.0066

434600

mod_top5tables( )

.../site_page.php:18

0.0067

435032

date ( )

.../mod_top5.php:30

( ! ) Warning: date(): It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are required to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected the timezone 'UTC' for now, but please set date.timezone to select your timezone. in /home/crucl/public_html/EPS/mod_top5.php on line 105
Call Stack
#	Time	Memory	Function	Location
1	0.0013	308616	{main}( )	.../site_page.php:0
2	0.0066	434600	mod_top5tables( )	.../site_page.php:18
3	1.5226	444544	date ( )	.../mod_top5.php:105

Call Stack

Time

Memory

Function

Location

0.0013

308616

{main}( )

.../site_page.php:0

0.0066

434600

mod_top5tables( )

.../site_page.php:18

1.5226

444544

date ( )

.../mod_top5.php:105

The Ecphorizer

Yossarian, Where Are You? Blues

Russ Traunstein

Issue #55 (March 1986)

Your Clinic was yesterday,
and here you come today!
I guess there's nothin' about it
a poor shrink like me can say!

You say you are sick,
gettin' sicker every day;
you look healthy to me, but
I'm a cynic, and you know the games people play;

so as soon as I can convince you you're better,
we're gonna take your compensation away!

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Return to Table of Contents for Issue #55

Top Articles - February	Hits
1. English Has No Future Tense Daunna Minnich	121
2. The Nature of Translation Ed Rehmus	116
3. Harry J. Anslinger Ed Rehmus	109
4. Meihem In Ce Klasrum Dolton Edwards	98
5. The Case of the Pious Pelican George Towner	86

Top Articles - All time	Hits
1. Linda's Parisian Burgers Tod Wicks	8048
2. Harry J. Anslinger Ed Rehmus	4911
3. The Symbolism of Horns Lisa Barrigan Basker	4873
4. The Case of the Pious Pelican George Towner	4589
5. Meihem In Ce Klasrum Dolton Edwards	4110

Top Authors - February	Hits
1. George Towner	1502
2. Gareth Penn	1298
3. John Cumming	615
4. Tod Wicks	611
5. Paul W. Healy	543

Top Authors - All time	Hits
1. George Towner	80480
2. Gareth Penn	72089
3. Tod Wicks	49691
4. John Cumming	33735
5. Paul W. Healy	28303

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