The Ecphorizer

Useful Middle Eastern Phrases
Captured on the Xerox Circuit

Issue #65 (April 1987)

Nipseh, khali-kili haftir loftan Kalashnikov:
Thank you for showing me your gun.

Fekr gabul cardan davat paeh gush divar manus:
I am happy to lie down on the floor with my hands up.

Shornaeh fekr tamomeh qeh gofteh bande. Dufte:
I agree with everything you say or think. Really.

Nipseh, auto arraregh davateman dunke sepaheh-hast:
Thank you for allowing me to travel in the trunk of your car.

Fashal-eh tupehman na degat, mano gofteh chesahayeh mohema telesvarman:
In return for not harming my genitals, I will gladly betray my country on television.

Khreld, jepahan maneh gofteh degat jurnalino va jayei-i Amerikanya:
Of course I will tell you the names of the reporters who are actually American spies.

Ghermez ahlieh, Ghorban:
Theblindfold fits perfectly, Excellency.

Tikeh nuneh ba ob khreleh bezorg va khjruba boyast ino begheram. Vo nagra zipe:
The bread crumbs in water are delicious. I must have the recipe.

Etehfor'an derati-i otageh smikrastam khe'do hafte ba garbanzas na Sheereel Tigz:
Truly, a night as a hostage is better than a year lying with the body of Cheryl Tiegs. 

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Xerox Circuit

Those bits and pieces of pre-home computer and Internet humor that gost passed around by running to the copy machine when someone shows you a cartoon or joke.  You could usually tell how popular it was by the number of smudges on the copy.