The Ecphorizer
Et Tu |
Brad Anderson |
Issue #16 (December 1982)
THE STAGE IS DARK. A WOMAN'S VOICE IS HEARD OFF-STAGE, LEFT.
Mommy: Time to get up son, your breakfast's getting cold and you'll be late for school.
Tommy: Momma, I don't feel so good. I think I'm gettin' a cold!
A TIGHT, SHARP SPOTLIGHT FADES SLOWLY IN ON A YOUNG BOY IN BED, STAGE LEFT, LUXURIATING IN HIS LAST FEW MINUTES OF FREEDOM.
TIME PASSES.
Mommy: Son, get dressed and get down here right now -
Tommy: But Mom, I had the most terrible dream last night. There were -
MOMMY APPEARS IN A SPOT A FEW FEET LEFT OF THE BED. SHE IS DRESSED IN A BLUE BATHROBE.
Mommy: I don't CARE what you saw, you're going to school!
TOMMY GETS OUT OF BED AND IS CLOTHED IN SCHOOL CLOTHES. MOMMY REMOVES THE BATHROBE TO REVEAL A DRESS. AS THIS HAPPENS, THEIR SPOTS SLOWLY FADE AND THE LIGHTS COME UP STAGE RIGHT TO REVEAL A BARE-FRAME DOORWAY CENTER STAGE AND A FLAG, BLACKBOARD AND STUDENT DESK STAGE RIGHT.
TOMMY MOVES THROUGH THE DOORWAY WHILE MOMMY CROSSES BEHIND IT. TOMMY TAKES HIS SEAT.
Mommy: Good morning, Tommy.
Tommy: Good morning, Mrs. Evans.
Mommy: Tommy, will you lead us in the flag salute this morning.
TOMMY RISES.
Both: I pledge allegiance to the flag of the United States of America and -
BLACKOUT, FOLLOWED A FEW SECONDS LATER BY A BRIGHT RED FLASH AND THE AMPLIFIED SOUND OF A LIGHTBULB POPPING. THE RED GLARE REVEALS THE CHARACTERS ARE GONE.
THE RED GLOW SLOWLY FADES TO BLACK. A WOMAN'S VOICE IS HEARD OFFSTAGE, LEFT.
Mommy: Time to get up son, your breakfast's getting cold and you'll be late for school.
Tommy: Momma, I don't feel so good. I think I'm gettin' a cold.
TIME PASSES.
Mommy: Son, get dressed and get down here right now -
Tommy: But Mom, I had the most terrible dream last night. There were people with only two legs and -
BLACKOUT FOLLOWED BY A BRIGHT GREEN FLASH AND THE AMPLIFIED SOUND OF A LIGHTBULB POPPING. THE GREEN GLARE REVEALS AN EMPTY STAGE AND THEN SLOWLY FADES.
©1982 Brad Anderson
He calls himself "a defrocked dental student." Now a general practice attorney, his motto is "Suits pressed while you wait."
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