The Ecphorizer

Avoiding AIDS

Andy Fish

Issue #59 (October 1986)

We first heard of AIDS as a disease of homosexuals and Haitians. Then we learned that heroin addicts and hemophiliacs were also at risk. Next Rock Hudson died. Now AIDS is spreading to heterosexuals. The lesson for the prudent is obvious. If you are a haberdasher or historian, make a career change. If you are studying at Harvard, transfer. If you are high-strung, try to relax; if you are hateful, be nice. If your name is Hake or Herring, change it. If you live in Hayward, move.

ANDY FISH and is the name we apply to pieces whose authorship is confidential, unknown, or irrelevant.

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Return to Table of Contents for Issue #59

Top Articles - April	Hits
1. The Symbolism of Horns Lisa Barrigan Basker	104
2. The Full Treatment Paul Gregson	96
3. English Has No Future Tense Daunna Minnich	93
4. Meihem In Ce Klasrum Dolton Edwards	93
5. Unraveling the Inexplicable Statement L. Allinikov	81

Top Articles - All time	Hits
1. The Symbolism of Horns Lisa Barrigan Basker	25579
2. The Case of the Pious Pelican George Towner	10554
3. English Has No Future Tense Daunna Minnich	10192
4. Meihem In Ce Klasrum Dolton Edwards	10104
5. An Outline of Philosophy C. Slezak	9313

Top Authors - April	Hits
1. Gareth Penn	1366
2. George Towner	1335
3. Paul Gregson	638
4. Susan Packie	466
5. Tod Wicks	401

Top Authors - All time	Hits
1. George Towner	168961
2. Gareth Penn	158065
3. Tod Wicks	89391
4. John Cumming	70951
5. Paul W. Healy	63510

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