The Ecphorizer
Carcinogen |
Carl C. Partlow |
Issue #12 (August 1982)
I knew that it would happen,
For years my greatest fear.
Scientists have determined,
"Cancer is caused by beer."
In twenty tests conducted
Since nineteen twenty-three,
Rats drank beer four times a day;
Now, none are cancer-free.
Perhaps I need not worry
I'm thirty-eight, you know
Rats took nearly sixty years;
I've twenty-two to go.
Then, too, to my advantage,
The rats I far outweigh.
For me to drink a like amount
Requires a keg each day.
For years my greatest fear.
Scientists have determined,
"Cancer is caused by beer."
In twenty tests conducted
Since nineteen twenty-three,
Rats drank beer four times a day;
Now, none are cancer-free.
Perhaps I need not worry
I'm thirty-eight, you know
Rats took nearly sixty years;
I've twenty-two to go.
Then, too, to my advantage,
The rats I far outweigh.
For me to drink a like amount
Requires a keg each day.
Southern Californian Carl C. Partlow is a law student who has published numerous poems and short stories.
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