The Ecphorizer

Punishment or Reward?
JJ Tiger

Issue 09 (April 2007)


Our resident Road Jockey gets chewed out for going 3x the speed of sound!

Old departure was gonna be Thursday 0400.

New departure is Thursday afternoon, maybe around 3:15 PM.

Going to North Platte, Nebraska, with a load of Kleenex facial tissue, and ... what do you call the tissue for the other end of the body: ass wipes?

Here's the story:

...one automated computer entry [showed] where my speed for the day was in excess of 2100 miles per hour...

Yesterday, (Tuesday) I was driving back to Memphis from Mobile, on hwy 98. As you cross into Mister-ippi from Abba-blama, you sometimes have to stop at the weigh station. They were open. I had to stop.

Most drivers simply go across the scales to have the ground-pressure checked. Every once in a while, a driver gets waved over. I got the full blown Level 1 D.O.T. Inspection. I got written up for two burned-out lights, and a log book violation.

Today, I stopped for fuel at the Memphis Swift terminal, got the light bulbs replaced, and reported with the D.O.T. report to my Driver Manager to face the firing squad.

Four different members of management spoke to, and spoke at me for about two hours about the log book violation, and how the company's computer's automated report show speeds much lower than what is indicated by my daily log book, and one automated computer entry where my speed for the day was in excess of 2100 miles per hour (three times the speed of sound).

... I said: "Garbage In, Garbage Out."

... I wanted to paraphrase something out of that Top Gun movie: "Well  
Goose. You select Zone Four afterburner and let that beast do what it  
can."

I don't know if it's punishment or reward: I have to be at the training department tomorrow (Thursday) morning to attend Driver Training Mentor training. After the one-day class, I will be issued a student who will ride with me for six weeks.

I have been drafted as a trainer...
... again. 


Live the life of a road warrior transporting all manner of goods from one end of the USA to the other, and points in between.  He enjoys writing about some of the more preposterous aspects of his otherwise entertaining job.

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